WINNER WINNER WINNER!!!

                           

Based on our random drawing... I am happy to announce that this contests winner is :

CASEY LEACH!

Thank you all for playing, and keep an eye out for out next GIVEAWAY!

Casey please message me an address where I can mail you your prize!

SEEKING HUMAN KINDNESS

                       

Tomorrow is a big day for me. I will spend an hour undercover holding a sign on a street corner. 

I am afraid! I'd be lying if I said I wasn't. I am afraid of the humiliation I will face. I'm afraid of how strangers will view me in that moment. I'm afraid for my own safety, though I will have a phone, pepper spray and a near by spy watching for my safety. 

I am afraid of many things, Most of all I am afraid that I will be disappointed in humanity. What if someone laughs at me? What if someone is snide or hateful? How will I feel when people drive past as of I'm not there. Afraid to look at me in the eye?

I'm afraid that no one will reach out a human hand of grace.
I'm afraid! 

But with fear I also feel hope. Hope for a loving and accepting hand. Someone to look me in the eye, treat me like an equal and meet me where I am at that moment. 

I am very careful to keep my deception here at a minimum. I will not hold a sign asking for spare change or promises of work for food. I will hold a simple cardboard sign that simple reads....

"SEEKING HUMAN KINDNESS" 

And that my friends is the exact truth. 

I will promptly donate any gifts to the local shelter along with a gift of my own. I will not be abusing peoples generosity anymore than needed for the sake of this undercover project. 

I just thought I'd share my heart tonight as I plan for a big day tomorrow.

A Poem about Homelessness- Although I Wish...

Although I Wish...

December 20, 2011

All I got is this bag

Tattered and so frayed

One pair of socks to call my own

No place for my head to lay.

Beg for money to buy my food

No fork or knife, man this is crude

I wish I knew what I could do

I should slam a six of booze.

People passing in their fine business suits

Acting as if I am not here

“I am a man!” I want to shout

This life is hard to bear.

There is no job to be had

So I sit and hope for better things

Or I organize my tattered bag

Whatever it takes to not feel sad.

The sun is setting it is night

My fight has just begun

I pray I won’t freeze before it’s through

Although I wish my life was done.

GIVEAWAY GIVEAWAY GIVEAWAY!!!

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Starbucks gift card worth $15 dollars.

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Project #2 announcement

As project #1 is concluded, I would like to announce the topic for project #2. Project #2 will face homelessness in America head on. I will do what I can to authentically tell this story so that we might learn to be compassionate and less prejudiced. Walking a mile in someone else’s shoes makes judging them very difficult.

As part of this project I will be going undercover. I will sit on a street corner and hold a cardboard sign. I want to know what it feels like to be at the mercy of the generosity of others.  I will promptly give away any gifts I might receive to a homeless person in my area.

In addition to this, I will also visit a homeless shelter and speak with volunteers there and maybe someone living in the shelter if they are willing.

I hope you stay tuned this week as I will be posting meaningful articles on this subject.

Peace to all.

Char 

This video is called "Make the Homeless smile." it is very touching.

Project #1 Stay-at-Home Parenting Conclusion

Stay-At-Home Parenting: A Big Decision

Let’s be slow to judge.

For many parents who stay home with their children, the decision isn't always an easy one. You must weigh the money and the satisfaction you get from your job and figure out whether it's worth the necessary sacrifices – and there can be many – to stay home and care for your child yourself.

After reading many articles and interviewing stay-at-home parents, I have a broader view of how and why these choices are made.  For some, it is a purely economic decision.  For others, it is a lack of good childcare options.  For still others, it is the desire to be the one attending to their child's day-to-day needs.

If you ask any stay-at-home parent why he or she does it, moms and dads alike say they value the chance to share their child's developmental accomplishments, along with the security of knowing they are in charge of their child's care.

”It’s important to both of us [spouse, sic] that the kids have a parent at home.”

“They’re mine so I don’t want to pay someone else to spend the day with them. “

“I always knew I wanted to be a stay-at-home parent.”

Those were some of the answers given to me as to what motivated some of my interviewees.

What are the advantages of being a stay-at-home parent?

You will be your child's caretaker 24/7, ensuring a relaxed and nurturing environment. You will be there for all those "firsts" in your child’s life, which is sure to be incredibly satisfying.

For some families, it is actually less expensive for one parent to stay home than to pay for childcare to allow both parents to work outside the home.

If you can afford it, you may find that staying home reduces your stress levels. Many parents decide to stay home after trying – unsuccessfully - to balance work and family. One mom listed not having to dress in work clothes as a perk to staying home and another listed the freedom found in a more open schedule.

Staying home will give you more time to spend with your children, maintain your home, and help keep your family life running smoothly.

What’s not to like – So what are the disadvantages?

For some people, loneliness tops the list. When asked about the struggles faced as stay-at-home parent, one mom responded, “loneliness, and feeling of not accomplishing anything, ever.”

Stay-at-home dads may feel doubly isolated because there are so few of them and sadly, gender stereotypes persisting even today can inflict a lot of social pressure.

Changing diapers and tackling endless loads of laundry can be – will be! - boring and frustrating. You may have to look hard for a sense of accomplishment or satisfaction in repetitive and seemingly menial tasks.  

Additionally, finding time for yourself when you are home alone with an attention-seeking baby or toddler can be next-to impossible. Time management in regards to self-care, relaxation, or general everyday life was listed as the top struggle in my interviews.

And while you won't be shelling out thousands of dollars each year for childcare, choosing to stay home is a complicated economic decision. Many families with a stay-at-home parent find they have to budget carefully and devote more time to bargain hunting than before. “You might have to substitute camping trips for hotel vacations, cook at home instead of eating out regularly”, stated one stay-at-home dad.

Negative public opinions of stay-at-home parenting are not a new thing. Many stay-at-home parents feel that they are perceived as a sort of second class citizen, a lazy non-contributor to society with an abundance of free time. Some feel under-valued with their efforts going largely unrecognized.

No matter how you look at it, staying home with a child is a big decision, and one that should not be viewed negatively. It is an honorable use of time, energy, and skills. These parents sacrifice much in order to stay home.  These sacrifices should not be discredited, go unnoticed, and least of all be dismissed as being of no value.

More Good Stuff!

I found this article amazing titled 'Pride and Prejudice'. It is about stay at home dads. I am posting it as my last entry before tomorrows project finally. Enjoy and stay tuned.

Pride and Prejudice

Since I’m hanging up the diaper bag as a SAHD (at least for now), I though it would be a good time to write about the prejudices that SAHDs face every day.  People have gross assumptions about men and how they take care of kids.  This by no means has been helped by the film industry with movies like “Mr. Mom“.  Recently there was also an article published by Time Healthland that disparaged SAHDs by concluding that the divorce rate was much higher in this group, when actually it was unemployed (not by choice) SAHDs that had a higher divorce rate.  I think people, and I hate to say it but especially women, need to understand that men can do as good a job at raising children as women do.  In fact, in some cases SAHDs may be better (Just ask Vicki. She’d be the first to tell you that she’d go crazy doing what I do on a daily basis.)
I think that one the most common comments I get when I am out with the kids is “You have your hands full!”, or “Dad’s day out, eh?”.  When I hear these comments I want to turn and tell the person, “look, I work full time from home and take care of 2 kids, and they are thriving, so keep it to yourself bub!”, but I usually just say something like “every day is dad’s day out!”  The other day, one woman put me over the top.  We were at the zoo, where most of these things seem to happen, and we were walking across the brand new bridge to a new exhibit.  I was pushing the stroller which was acting as a very convenient diaper bag holder since it is 90+ degrees out, and as always I was wearing Maisie while Cecilia was walking close behind me.  Now this bridge is about 30 or so feet above a creek bed that is filled with foliage, and this grandma said “I hope she does not fall through, someone should watch her more carefully!”  The lady was there with her kids and grandkids, and I was fed up.  I said, “Look, this bridge is brand new, built to code, and is in a place where kids are expected to run freely around.  THEY CAN’T FALL THROUGH!”, and just walked off.  She looked a bit dumbfounded, and she should for making such an asinine comment.  I bet she never would have commented if I was a women with my two kids!
I think the biggest problem with our society today regarding dads as primary care giver is that people assume that we are doing it because we have lost a job.  The article mentioned above in Time Healthland displays this perfectly.  The study that the author referenced only refers to men who have lost a job and are forced into a position where they are taking care of the kids when they would prefer to be working and providing for their family.  Needless to say, the men who did not choose the role of SAHD are likely to be dissatisfied with their position.  The article uses this study and erroneously concludes that all SAHDs are dissatisfied. However, I and many others have chosen to take the position of stay at home dad.  I know this is just speculation, but if a women lost her job and was forced into the role of a stay at home parent, I would wager that the findings would be similar with respect to dissatisfaction and divorce.  All this study tells me is that an unhappy parent is not a good parent (or a good spouse for that matter).
I also feel that when dads are alone with their kids, people treat our kids differently then they would if a mother was present.  Just last week I was at the zoo (again with the zoo!) with the kids.  As usual Maisie was sleeping on me in the wrap.  As we were walking, an elderly woman noticed Cecilia and mentioned that she was adorable.  Then she noticed that I also had a baby in the wrap on my chest.  What did she do with this new found sensory data?  She walked up to me, said “Ohhh and you have another one here!”, and proceeded to try to pull the wrap from the baby’s face to see her!  I stepped back and said very sternly “She is sleeping”.  At this point most people might apologize or just walk away, but she actually stepped forward again and tried to pull on the wrap again!  At this point I warded off her hand and said with a strong hint of anger, “No, She is sleeping!”  She still did not get it, so I just started walking away.  People do not do things like this to mothers with their kids, at least not as much.  Yet it happens to me all the time.  But really, why would someone think this is totally appropriate, especially to do this to a complete stranger!  Mom may be a mama bear protecting her cubs, but I am a freaking sleeping giant…. Don’t mess with me. I tend to ignore most things like this but something are going too far and one can only stand so much.
So as I hang up my diaper bag and retire from the SAHD world, I’m a little bit sad that I’m not continuing to break down barriers and stereotypes about fathers as primary caregivers.  I do promise, however, continue to fight the battle as a weekend warrior!



http://piratesandpears.com/2012/07/04/pride-prejudice/